E62: TOLWM + Sarai Speer x Int'l Fv&%@^' Women's Day

On this unapologetically raw and fiery International Women’s Day episode, I sit down (live!) with the unstoppable Sarai Speer, aka The Platinum Giraffe. We throw out the scripts and get straight into what this day really means—beyond the Instagram posts and corporate shoutouts. From the ways women are still being told to “stay in their lane” to the times we decided to burn the lane down entirely, this conversation is a full-bodied call to action, wrapped in humor, truth, and a little bit of swearing. Because, honestly, what’s empowerment without a little edge?

Key Insights & Takeaways:

• The Myth of Gratitude as a Muzzle: Why “be humble, be grateful” is often code for “stay small”—and how we’re done with that.
• Women Supporting Women… But Are We? We dig into the ways women sometimes gatekeep power instead of sharing it and why true empowerment means lifting as we climb. 
• Taking Up Space—And Not Apologizing for It: Sarai and I talk about moments when we had to step into our own power, despite the noise telling us to shrink.
• International Women’s Day Rewritten: If we got to rebrand the day, what would we call it? (Spoiler: It’s not for the faint of heart.)
• The One-Minute Mic Drop: If you had one minute to rally every woman on this planet, what would you say? Sarai’s answer? Pure fire.
• Justice—Not Just for the Few: We closed with a discussion about justice—who gets it, who doesn’t, and what it actually means when we say we want a just world. Because justice isn’t just a word; it’s a responsibility.

Thought Prompts:

• When was the last time you took up space unapologetically? What would it look like to do that today? No, it's not a holiday. It's YOUR day!
• Have you ever been told to “be grateful” in a way that felt more like a leash than a celebration? How did you respond?
• In what ways can we better show up for other women—especially when no one’s watching?
• What’s your personal rallying cry? If you had one minute to empower women everywhere, what would you say?
• What does justice mean to you? How do you contribute to making it real?

Want more musings, updates, and behind-the-scenes antics? Subscribe for the latest and follow me on social—because life is too weird to go it alone. 🚀✨

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Transcript

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Natalie P.: Hello, Hello!

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Natalie P.: Welcome to a live episode just off the cuff going live? Holy hell! That's what we've done of think out loud with me, and today my guest Sarai spear, Aka, the platinum giraffe Aka.

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Natalie P.: one of my outrageously cool connections in this adventure of finding people to think out loud with me.

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Natalie P.: Sarai is back for a check in on this day. It is an absolutely stunning day, this fine ass day. It's International Women's Day happens to be and I can't think of something I'd rather be doing right now than shooting the shit with you, sister. Say, hey.

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Sarai Speer: Honestly I feel like cause we were supposed to record this before. And I just love that we recorded it today. Cause it's International Women's Day.

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Natalie P.: Right.

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Sarai Speer: We've got 2 bad bitches like ready to just see where this conversation goes. I'm so freaking excited to be here, friend.

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Natalie P.: Cool. What the saying is, which is, as soon as I start using the overusing, the saying, it's everywhere for me, right? It's like intent is always working like, yeah, we were supposed to meet today. Of course, here we are. So let's cut to the chase. Then.

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Sarai Speer: Let's do it.

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Natalie P.: I'm gonna be honest

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Natalie P.: as I'm sitting here, I'm literally sitting here, and you've you've got the same thing. I'm looking around at your cool backdrop

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Natalie P.: in front of me over my my camera. I've got Frida Kahlo.

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Natalie P.: I look on my shelf. I've got everybody from my Angelou to I I like, and behind me, and yet somehow

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Natalie P.: I've shared a few memes over the years.

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Natalie P.: But this is like

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Natalie P.: this. The last 10 min of you and me has is the absolute most I've ever done in my life to celebrate myself and to celebrate you and to celebrate all these women internationally.

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Natalie P.: I'm just gonna put that out there.

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Sarai Speer: You know what's interesting is this is the 1st year that I can remember it meaning so much to me. I think in years past I've been like, Oh, great! It's Women's Day and Happy International Women's Day. But this year I'm like

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Sarai Speer: fuck. Let's like, I want to celebrate everybody, every woman shape, size, like I'm just. I'm so into this. I'm like, you're gonna be sick of hearing about international Women's Day when you are done having a conversation with me today.

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Natalie P.: River.

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Natalie P.: Because why not?

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Sarai Speer: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: I mean. And isn't that the nature of our game, too, like I don't want to spout too much about who I am, because I might. You know we are also. We're in this space of just freaking over conditioning to like, not want to offend. But where do we land? And then there's this moment of like, you know, realization that I've had.

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Natalie P.: which sounds again. I guess I'm just feeling super like I'll just spew truth the connection of truly feeling

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Natalie P.: that women's rights are human rights.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: And that makes my heart like do something.

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Natalie P.: And that's how I know it's my truth.

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Sarai Speer: And I've never paid attention to that before.

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Natalie P.: Just since, like, how long have you and I known each other? This is like this is a new thing for me to feel, and I know you like you've locked into something. I've watched you like, what is this that's got us

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Natalie P.: this truth where it's like an.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah, that.

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Sarai Speer: Yes, I I think that I know for me. I've taken a lot of

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Sarai Speer: a lot of this for granted that you know I've had rights. I've not had to necessarily fight tooth and nail, for you know things while I have.

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Sarai Speer: But I think with the current state of our fucking dumpster fire world. I think we're really

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Sarai Speer: seeing things come to the forefront. And for me, you know, somebody. Somebody said something the other day, and I just looked at them, and I was like, Are you fucking insane? I was talking about women's rights and how I'm moving to a state where I'm a little scared to move there, and somebody was like, Well, you're not. You can't get pregnant, anyway. So what does it matter to you? And I'm like, Oh, oh.

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Natalie P.: Snap.

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Sarai Speer: Like, is it? Is this? Is this really the way the conversation is going to go? Hold on. Let me educate you. Because why it matters is all women's rights matter, and it's you know it's so

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Sarai Speer: in the forefront right now, everywhere we look.

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Sarai Speer: we're being told we're wrong to stay home to make babies. If you don't produce kids, you're wrong. It's like all of these things are being shoved at us all the time. And here's the fucked up thing, Natalie, like

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Sarai Speer: it doesn't like you. You try to fit yourself into this box, but then somebody else gives you another box, and you're like, oh, fuck! So now I got to fit into this box, and then it's another box, and and it keeps changing. And so I think what I've done is like, fuck your boxes. I'm done. I'm done. I'm going to go live in some fucking parallel universe. I'm going to live in a little octagon, and I'm not gonna make myself small anymore.

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Sarai Speer: I tried that. I tried playing all the games fitting into the little boxes, and I lost pieces of myself and the last couple of years I've been putting Humpty Dumpty back together again, and I will not fucking. Go back there, and I'm to the point where

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Sarai Speer: I used to want everybody to like me, and you know I wanted to be. I wanted to play nice with everybody, and I don't mean to be a Dick, but at the same time, like I'm going to speak for my fucking truth for what I believe in. And if that offends you, that sounds like a, you problem, not a me problem

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Sarai Speer: period, full stop.

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Natalie P.: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: because the

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Natalie P.: the comfort of.

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Natalie P.: because what we've done all of our lives. And and I'll say our, because I think I'm relating to your story is like

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Natalie P.: we have found comfort in other people's comfort. And

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Natalie P.: That's not a bad thing. That's not a that's not an I don't care for you.

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Natalie P.: That is.

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Natalie P.: I am going to answer my my truth, my truth first.st And now I've gotten to a place this isn't about.

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Natalie P.: You know I'm I'm sensitive to the concept of someone saying, Well, that's just how I am, and you're going to have to deal with it.

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Natalie P.: That's not what I'm saying at all.

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Natalie P.: I'm saying that

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Natalie P.: what comes out of me and what gets expressed from me in its full form is beautiful, and that I take responsibility for it, and I am feeding this like inner wellspring of creativity and craziness to test the own. My own

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Natalie P.: outer limits.

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Natalie P.: I want to see how crazy I am.

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Natalie P.: And that's gonna scare people that scares me. That's always scared me, that has always scared me.

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Natalie P.: How crazy are you, Natalie?

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Natalie P.: That's that is generational. That is, that is my, that's my lineage.

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Natalie P.: Why am I like, yeah, man, I could go off and create, like

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Natalie P.: the voice, the speaking up, the finding of truth.

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Natalie P.: You know, just it's it's an incredible thing to

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Natalie P.: And I think the word we use is is power, just as a placeholder. It's it's not a it's not, it's it's not the same kind, it's a it's a knowing that that you can't unknow.

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Natalie P.: So.

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Sarai Speer: And I think that that made me think of this, this power, this placeholder power. It's almost this fierce.

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Sarai Speer: deep knowing of yourself, of your

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Sarai Speer: your beliefs, your expression of your beliefs. It's not this. I'm gonna put my thumb on. You kind of power. But this, like almost this, like mama, bear sort of

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Sarai Speer: fierceness that

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Sarai Speer: I am who I am. I'm weird. I'm I'm all of these things, and I'm fucking okay with this.

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Natalie P.: And.

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Sarai Speer: You know, it's so interesting because I look back in my twenties and I think about you know all the women I trash talked and like, oh, this 40 year old bitch, or this 50 year old bitch, and sitting at 44 now.

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Sarai Speer: You know, I

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Sarai Speer: I also envied those older women, because there was something about them, and at the time I couldn't put my finger on it. And I was like, man. These bitches don't care like these

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Sarai Speer: this bitches just they don't give a fuck, and they're they're cool and they're weird. And so I think in my twenties that triggered me. I was trying to, you know. Stay in these boxes and be everything to everybody. And now I'm like.

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Sarai Speer: I want to be that weird lady that, like I mean. I'm wearing face jewels on my forehead like I'm a 12 year old because it you know what it makes me fucking happy. It makes me happy, and I want to keep finding my weird and finding my voice, and finding these people who support that, who not only support that, but they want to be part of it. They want to lift you up. This really beautiful

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Sarai Speer: sisterhood that I missed out in my younger years. I missed out in my teen years on this sisterhood, on this fierce, fucking, powerful, weird woman sanctuary. And now I'm fully embracing it like the weirder the better. Bring it on. Let's lift each other's weird up.

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Natalie P.: That's awesome. Where were you this last this last trip?

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Sarai Speer: So I actually, I went on a goddess retreat. And let me tell you, I.

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Natalie P.: Had a little bit of trepidation about sharing a house with 12 uteruses, because I was like, Oh.

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Natalie P.: me! Heart! Palpitations!

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Sarai Speer: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, it can go really good. It could go really bad. It could be 80 shades in between. But I decided, because, you know, I've always sort of said, Oh, I'm a i'm a guy's girl, and I never really had these deep, beautiful, intimate women friendships.

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Natalie P.: Weird lady that like I mean, I'm wearing.

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Sarai Speer: So I decided to.

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Natalie P.: Like I'm a 12 year old.

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Natalie P.: Oh, sorry.

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Natalie P.: Keep going.

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Sarai Speer: Okay. I was like, I hear my voice in the back.

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Natalie P.: Yeah, it wasn't supposed to do that. Sorry.

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Sarai Speer: No, you're good. So I decided to do this retreat. One of my friends put it on, and I just went in with an open mind. And can I just tell you it?

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Sarai Speer: I'm not even sure I still have words to describe it. It was it was this sacred.

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Sarai Speer: safe space where we just

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Sarai Speer: we dug in and we talked about shit we bonded. And it was like immediate. It wasn't this.

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Sarai Speer: It wasn't this shit that you see on Instagram. That's like, you know, women support women. And meanwhile they're talking shit behind each other's back. It was this.

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Sarai Speer: this warm, gooey, beautiful space that we could come to heal together.

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Sarai Speer: We could talk, we did, yoga, we did we? Fucking, painted our faces with these jewels. We had dance parties. We dumped in the pool with clothes on, we hot tubbed.

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Sarai Speer: We got to experience

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Sarai Speer: our inner goddess, our femininity, our divine energy, in such a way that I was like.

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Sarai Speer: Oh, oh, I've always run very masculine, very fire, very pitta energy. And so for me to like, lean into this feminine I was like, oh, I don't know. I don't know. This doesn't feel familiar. But, God damn it, I came out of that. And I was like.

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Sarai Speer: Oh, shit. Okay, all right. So I'm gonna wear sparkles on my face to go out in public. I don't give a fuck anymore. I'm gonna wear what I want. I learned to really appreciate my body

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Sarai Speer: in that space, because looking, we're all so beautiful. And I was looking at these women, and I'm like, God, you're you're drop dead gorgeous. And it didn't matter the shape or the size.

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Sarai Speer: And I was like, you're so beautiful. And I was like how

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Sarai Speer: you know what. So am I, and and I don't know that I've ever

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Sarai Speer: looked at my body, looked at myself, and thought you were so beautiful, Sarai, and I did at that retreat, and I was like, oh, my.

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Sarai Speer: this is such a big breakthrough! This is such a huge moment for me, and just getting to share that it. It was so

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Sarai Speer: freaking. Powerful I had.

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Sarai Speer: I had 0 expectation for it. I didn't want to label it with expectations. I just knew that it was going to be an experience one way or the other, and it was.

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Sarai Speer: It was beyond my wildest dreams, it was so

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Sarai Speer: empowering. And you know we have a group chat. We still talk to each other today like we're sending each other memes and and all these things. And like these beautiful little

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Sarai Speer: connections throughout, where we got to talk to different people, and and by the end of it, you know, there's 12 of us, and we're all we're all friends. We're all like genuine friends, and I'm like, it's weird because I feel like I've known you bitches for a lifetime like I just met you 5 days ago, and yet we've buried our soul to each other. We literally stared at each other in the eyeballs for 3 min, crying, not saying a damn word.

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Sarai Speer: It's so powerful when you're around that type of woman who wants to celebrate your success, who is ready to become this

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Sarai Speer: version of herself that is unashamed, that is proud, that is uplifting, and it's just oh, God! I got like goosebumps all over my body.

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Natalie P.: No, and it came through.

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Natalie P.: You know those are. That's the type of of you know, content that comes through and gives you goosebumps when you're watching it, because you can witness the energy, you know, and I think

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Natalie P.: that this, this exposure that we give

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Natalie P.: of each other this, this this head 1st dive in. I don't even know how to dive.

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Natalie P.: I belly flop, but if I'm being given

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Natalie P.: a chance, so it struck me while you were talking about the the concept of divine, feminine and divine masculine. And there are some voices that you know, including my mom and my grandmother, where we had. Yes, we did break the ceiling. We were doing the best. We gave it all. We were rebels, we we we have been, but that was still within the constructs of

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Natalie P.: us that has always been in the constructs, and we continue to play in that game knowingly right? But it's this next level of

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Natalie P.: knowingly being dipping in and out. And when I come into this space in this, I'll call it the Linkedin Beige world.

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Natalie P.: I'm not beijing down anymore.

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Natalie P.: Yeah. So is this the appropriate space?

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Natalie P.: I don't care anymore.

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Natalie P.: I have friends on here.

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Natalie P.: and that's who I'm talking to. I might have known him for a blip. I might have known him for most of my career before, you know. Long before Linkedin was ever a blip in its young teenager. Founders. Eye right.

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Natalie P.: whoever that was, I don't even know anymore.

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Natalie P.: But so we talk about.

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Natalie P.: So it this is interesting to me, too, because what you're flirting with, too, and we don't want to give it too much air time.

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Natalie P.: but we talk about empowering each other. We talk about walking into these spaces together and and and we celebrate. But I want to be. Women aren't supporting women.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: As a as a rule, there's there's so much work that we have to do. And I just want to know your 2 cents on like, where do we still need to get our act together from like your perspective?

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Sarai Speer: Fuck.

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Natalie P.: Pick a topic. And like, let's.

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Sarai Speer: I mean for me. It is when women supporting women and I made a post about this on Instagram this morning. It is all women. It is. It is trans women. It is black women, it is bipoc, it is disabled, it is, it is women. It is fucking women, and the thing is like, I don't necessarily have to agree with you. We don't have to be best friends, but as a woman I support you. I support your voice, I support your choice. I support your truth.

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Sarai Speer: and I think that we, especially as white women, I think that

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Sarai Speer: we have a lot of privileges that other people don't. And so we don't have the perspective

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Sarai Speer: to be able to include every single woman like.

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Sarai Speer: and I see it all the time, and women supporting women is not. I'm gonna cherry pick. I'm gonna support my white women, or I'm going to support my, if you're a lesbian, I don't support you, or if you're a masculine, I don't. No bitch like fucking support means all across the board, all across the board. And so I think

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Sarai Speer: this space of inclusivity is. It's so vast, it's so broad.

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Sarai Speer: But women supporting women again, does not mean that I necessarily agree with everything that you're saying, Natalie. I don't have to, but what I can do is I can support you as a woman and go fuck dude. You're dealing with some hard shit. You got the patriarchy smashing down on you, too, like let's band together. I don't have to

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Sarai Speer: have these best friend conversations with you, but what I do have to do is, I have to fucking support you. I have to stand up for you, and I have to hold your hand and encourage you to do the same, and that's the ripple effect that we have. So I think there's there's a long way to go. There is such a long way to go, and we're human. We're not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but I think inclusivity for all women shapes, sizes, ethnicities, religious background, sexual preference. You name it.

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Sarai Speer: Women supporting women means no exceptions.

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Natalie P.: I totally agree.

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Natalie P.: Yeah. And I. And I, I agree, and

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Natalie P.: on a different level. Yeah, I'm just. I'm intent, is always working

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Natalie P.: as a woman in my own, like looking back over my my life, and just in a space now of

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Natalie P.: reflection and gratitude, and just

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Natalie P.: the awareness of

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Natalie P.: the female energy, the awareness of my own feminine, the the power of connection with beautiful women like you, where we're

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Natalie P.: waking up and looking at each other, and like

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Natalie P.: my God, I see myself in you.

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Natalie P.: and have a moment of just quiet like heart knowing is like such a cool space to be in. Yeah.

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Natalie P.: I'm joining a a panel later this afternoon here in Loveland and

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Natalie P.: one of the the topics that well, the main topic. The kind of the overarching theme is justice.

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Natalie P.: And I'm curious, just, you know, kind of as a final.

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Natalie P.: I don't know reflection on this really. This big day.

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Natalie P.: What is justice

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Natalie P.: mean to you like and or and all wrapped into that like like, are there specific experiences that have really shaped

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Natalie P.: your understanding, your your definition of justice.

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Sarai Speer: Hitting me with the deep shit, friend.

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Natalie P.: I went deep. I got a shovel as my parting gift.

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Sarai Speer: Clearly.

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Sarai Speer: part. There's so much of me wants to grab my phone and like Google, like or not, Google, but chat gpt justice, I think it's.

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Natalie P.: Pick it apart.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah, I was, gonna say, I.

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Natalie P.: First.st What's your 1st instinct?

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Sarai Speer: Well, it's really complicated, because

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Sarai Speer: justice is. My brain wants to go. When somebody bad has done something bad, they get a punishment like. That's the the basic sort of

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Sarai Speer: you know a version of it.

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Sarai Speer: And then, as we dive deeper, it's

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Sarai Speer: it's complex. It's like, you know, if you were to dig into the ground and look at all of the root systems of the tree, you would see not just one, but these root systems are tangled with each other. So I feel like this is justice. And this is me unpacking the definition of it. Yeah,

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Sarai Speer: it's it's there's no, there's no clear cut definition for me, because.

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Sarai Speer: you know, if we look at some of these

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Sarai Speer: let's say executive orders that aren't exactly. You know the laws yet. Some of these executive orders, even though people are following the the orders. Correct.

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Sarai Speer: Doesn't mean that they're bringing justice. It doesn't mean what they are doing is right.

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Sarai Speer: And so it's. I think one person could say justices following the law or listening to. You know the

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Sarai Speer: the hierarchy. And my definition is not that it's

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Sarai Speer: in a perfect world.

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Sarai Speer: equality for everyone. I don't give a fuck who you are. I don't give a fuck what you believe who you have sex with none of that like

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Sarai Speer: I am such a human person. And the other thing is.

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Sarai Speer: I don't have to like you to love you, cause. I don't, fucking like a lot of people, but genuinely as a human. I love you like I, fucking love you. My soul sees your soul. I love you

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Sarai Speer: so. The concept of justice for me is.

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Sarai Speer: it's not following the law to the letter. It's not listening to. You know your boss or the hierarchy. To me justice is when

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Sarai Speer: things are hate the word fair, when things are

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Sarai Speer: what is the word I'm looking for? It's not going to come to me. But when things feel right for that person.

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Sarai Speer: And I don't know how to like package it.

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Sarai Speer: and I don't know if I'm doing it justice.

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Sarai Speer: I see what I did there. Oh, God! Sorry! That wasn't even a purposeful one that was literally like whoops.

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Sarai Speer: It's this sense of again. It's not right or wrong. It is.

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Natalie P.: I have a vision. I have a vision of you draped in in a in a toga.

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Natalie P.: and you have a blindfold on, and you're holding

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Natalie P.: right and like trying to find

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Natalie P.: it's it's right. It's like to each their own.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: Like.

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Natalie P.: and I think even in you trying to unpack it like we pack so much into a word that we don't even have

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Natalie P.: things like the justice that

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Natalie P.: I pretend to pursue. That I would like to pursue doesn't fit the definite. You know. The the justice I remember is about law and order. Well, hold on! Who makes the law?

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Natalie P.: Well, the government? Well, who makes the government? Well, we do well who makes like like I keep on, and I'm like, Wait, hold up right.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: So justice is just a fucking word. 1st of all, I think.

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Natalie P.: and then it's it for me. It like, like, it's that.

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Natalie P.: Yeah, it's that true that true North, where

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Natalie P.: where we are taking care of people to the point they want to be taken care of, and their knowing comes from a place of know comes from a true place of knowing. Will we ever get there? I have no idea. That's not for me to know. Can I work towards

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Natalie P.: my understanding of justice to give people voice. Yes, absolutely. And I think that's the back end of this is that justice is a good thing to pursue. I think we should all dig into what we understand it to be.

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Natalie P.: especially right. Now let's revisit the word it. It gets thrown a lot. It gets thrown around a lot.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: So I don't know. Maybe a takeaway.

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Natalie P.: You, lifting back up out of that.

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Natalie P.: are like a content creating machine on Instagram. You are having so much fun like. I've only known you a year and change, and you've already transformed like 17 times, and it's flipping, brilliant, and I love it. And I talk to my phone. I'm like, Go, girl.

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Natalie P.: And then I'm like, I, I have like, Okay, I liked 3 in a row. Let's calm down. You don't want to be like that girl where you're just like.

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Sarai Speer: You do. Do be that girl. Okay, let's let's go back to what we said at the beginning. Be that girl okay, be that fucking girl. Yes.

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Sarai Speer: like be that girl who likes other girls posts without.

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Natalie P.: That is how. Thank you.

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Sarai Speer: Me. You're welcome. Little perspective.

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Natalie P.: Tell tell folks what you're up to, and how to get in touch with you. If you.

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Sarai Speer: We have another 45, 50 min that I could know.

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Sarai Speer: Well, I I think since the last time we talked I've officially retired from hair. I was in the hair industry. For 20 years I traveled the world. I did all the cool things, and and then I burnt out, and I have shifted my focus. And so now I never thought I would teach Yoga. I am a certified Yoga teacher. I am a certified meditation teacher. This stuff blows my own mind.

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Sarai Speer: So if you've been following me on my journey, you're like, Wow! And yes, I use the word fuck in my Yoga classes, because it's who the fuck I am. I have been. I got certified as a mental health coach as a life coach. I really knew a couple years ago that I wanted to help people on a deeper level

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Sarai Speer: like the hair was great, and the education and doing that was all fantastic. But

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Sarai Speer: I kept hearing a lot of the same things, and and it had nothing to do with pricing. It had nothing to do with you, not being able to create content. It came down to this like self love, this self worth this self Sabotage piece. And so I've spent the last 2 years really diving into that. And and

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Sarai Speer: along with that doing my own healing, doing my own evolving, really growing, really getting uncomfortable. And you know, in the last couple months I've had some really scary, at least scary to me. Revelations of

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Sarai Speer: things that I used to think were witchy or woo, or just like, too, outside the box for me. And now I'm like

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Sarai Speer: fucking. I'm channeling. I it's so. This is the 1st time I've talked about this publicly. So I'm a little nervous. I'm not gonna lie. I'm just gonna keep talking. I have channeled. I'm getting into tarot and palm reading. I'm really just doing things that

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Sarai Speer: make me feel good in this space, and I'm putting myself first.st I'm doing a lot of self-care these days, which I didn't do any for like 40 fucking years, because I was on the hustle and grind train. And now I want to help women. I want to help women. I want to help women

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Sarai Speer: really

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Sarai Speer: find their power, because it's so hard in this world, and it gets lost. And we play these games and we play small. So I'm really just stepping into all of the modalities I'm trying things on and seeing what fits. And my husband the other day he was so funny because

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Sarai Speer: I was like Babe. I think I'm a witch, and he's like like a broom like, Get on a broom. And I'm like, No, like, you know, the really powerful women who were burned at the stake, and people said they were witches. I was like, I don't think I'm gonna like, you know, cast a spell on you, but I'm a fucking witch like I'm just gonna own this. And I'm a goddess, and I'm a weirdo and all the things. So this is a really really cool time in my life, like I'm I'm getting to do all of these

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Sarai Speer: beautiful things that I never I never saw myself doing this. I didn't imagine I would show up to a podcast ever in my life with the giant, sparkly unicorn horn on, I'm really embracing my feminine energy. I'm embracing just the present moment, the present moment being around beautiful people, you know. I hosted a retreat. Earlier this year. I went to a retreat earlier this year. I've made some really amazing connections. And I've turned my

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Sarai Speer: a community that used to be only hair education. It was all hair videos, and it used to be called balance stylist society, and I rebranded it to the anti hustle collective because we are getting out of that fucking hard hustle and grind, and we are learning to put ourselves first.st Now, anti hustle does not mean that I don't work, and that I don't work hard. It just means that there is. I'm putting myself. First, st I'm having boundaries. I'm using my voice. I'm opening my throat. Chakra.

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Sarai Speer: So I've got this beautiful community online. And I'm getting ready to create another community that is more of a healing community. Yep, I have not talked about that either. Online. I'm really excited for it. Because again, it's

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Sarai Speer: these are things that I'm like this would have been helpful for me. I wish I had this. I wish I had this, and so I'm like, fuck it. So I create like this is what you do. You're a fucking artist like you create, you create these spaces, and you know that famous line. If you build it, they will come. I just hold on to that with hope. So I I don't.

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Sarai Speer: I don't know what the future holds for me. I'm just enjoying the ride right now. I've got a couple speaking gigs booked for this year. I'm teaching at a goddess retreat for my friends. I'm speaking to Hairstylist in Miami. So I've got things here and there, but I'm just kind of like

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Sarai Speer: I'm I'm letting ease into my life. I'm letting flow into my life. I'm really leaning into that feminine energy this year and just going with the flow. This is, I think, this is the 1st year that I haven't had, like 800 goals and checked half of them off by now. And just really, you know.

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Sarai Speer: I'm pulling back. I'm pulling back on the reins. And I'm like, okay, we'll get there when we get there, and I don't even know where the fuck there is. So right.

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Natalie P.: Well, I'm sitting here watching you and feeling you, and like even just in the short time I've known you, you've transformed. And of course you know that about yourself. If I think about even just my own self the 1st time I talk to you, you know, it's

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Natalie P.: man. It's it's it's a trip, and

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Natalie P.: I to witness it is a really special thing to see just another human, you know.

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Natalie P.: pull it like it's almost like there's a string. There's days when I feel like there's a rope, there's a cord pulling me into the next, you know. Crazy idea right? And and if I?

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Natalie P.: If I jump in the shower full transparency, I can get that. I got to go in with a dry erase marker because I can get that pull. I can get that creative energy out of me onto the shower wall. And.

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Natalie P.: as you're saying, taking the to-do list, though from that.

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Natalie P.: away from a jam packed page of tiny little boxes that are insurmountable, and I'll never get it done to. Here's an idea. Go with the flow with this, and then, like

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Natalie P.: for control, freaks, for perfectionists, for people, pleasers for any of those of us that have, like imposters, people recovering from all of the bosoms, and all of this.

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Natalie P.: This is a big deal.

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Sarai Speer: Huge. I'm a recovering people pleaser. I'm a recovering perfectionist. I'm a recovering workaholic like I get it, because 2 years ago, if you'd have, said Sarai. This is where you'd be. I'd be like, Go fuck yourself like, yeah, no, no, you're crazy. And yet here I am, leaning into that space. Because

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Sarai Speer: you know what here's here's the deal, Natalie. I tried. I tried fitting in the boxes. I tried checking off the things I got, the things I got the cars. I got the house, I got the money I got, the I got I got I got, and I didn't

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Sarai Speer: feel

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Sarai Speer: joy. I felt exhausted. I felt stuck dry. I felt like fuck. I gotta keep going, because now they got a new car and I got to get a new car and they got more fun. I gotta. I was stuck on that train. And so the concept of.

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Sarai Speer: you know, do less. To do more has always been lost on me. I'm like that is the dumbest shit I've ever heard

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Sarai Speer: until it clicked.

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Sarai Speer: And you know, my my integrator, she does all my back end stuff like the systems and things that I'm like. I don't know. She's always told me we've been working together for a little over a year, and she's like less is more, less, is more. And I'm like, no more is more bitch like more is fucking more.

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Sarai Speer: I know I'm like, okay, Lauren. You were right. I was wrong.

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Sarai Speer: So it is. I get like, if you're listening to this, and you're like, Oh, but I couldn't. I could trust me. I understand that completely. And this is not Natalie. You know this has not happened overnight. I didn't wake up one morning. Go. I'm just gonna let everything flow, and I don't care. No, I still care, and I still try to hold on to control. And then I have to go. Okay. But like back off a little. Maybe if you just ease up like 15% girl like, okay.

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Sarai Speer: this is a process. It's a process of letting go. It's a process of remembering for me, remembering who I am, you know, and for me it's always been this.

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Sarai Speer: this fun, goofy, silly, dancing, singing, just full of life, human.

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Sarai Speer: And I've gotten back in touch with her. And I'm like cool. So what we want to do today is we want to put jewels on her face. And we want to dance in the front yard, and you know who knows where an idea will come from like I was in the bath the other day. It's where I do my best thinking. And I got this idea, this download, and I was like, yep, this is my next thing.

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Sarai Speer: Had I tried to force that with that masculine fire energy.

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Sarai Speer: But it just it came to me like a little mermaid. It just came to me in my bathtub, and I was like this, is it? This is the next thing we're going to do. And my idea for my book came to me in the bath, and I'm like, Here we go. Here we go! Here we go. So I understand. If that concept

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Sarai Speer: hits a little different like I can't let go. I can't. I get it. It's it's little bits at a time, little bits at a time.

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Natalie P.: I have a new friend that says subtle shifts, very subtle shifts.

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Natalie P.: And yeah, I mean, let's a shout out to like what's in between the lines here is that we all have a precious divine masculine in each of us, and what we're trying to do is find a beautiful balance between, and and knowing what a situation calls for, that is in line with who we are, and I invite, like

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Natalie P.: anybody listening divine, all of us.

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Natalie P.: each of us divine in our own ways, like if it hits home, if it if it lights a fire in you, I like, if it gets you agitty about something I would adore hearing from people like, I love that. And you know.

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Natalie P.: if today is international Women's Day, you know, what can we go? Do. We can go talk about these 2 crazy women that we just saw on live. And they're talking about this feminine stuff. Go talk about us for the love of all things sacred. Don't, don't! Don't stop like. Keep thinking about it.

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Natalie P.: Keep thinking about it. Keep being curious about this shit, being curious about your femininity. What the hell is femininity? What the hell is! Get curious! I'll talk about. I won't try and convert you, I promise. Why am I? No, I won't.

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Natalie P.: I'm going to wear sparkles on my face after this. That's not conversion, that is, support.

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Sarai Speer: Yes.

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Natalie P.: That is my mirror reflecting the beauty in front of me. And you know, my gosh, just like

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Natalie P.: if we leave the day with anything. Just you know, fuel, fuel, love. Love is in the tank.

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Natalie P.: Love is in the tank.

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Natalie P.: and we're doing things from a heart space. And we're fueling this crazy concept I have of an algorithm of love. No matter

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Natalie P.: if we're online or in bed, or what if.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: Right. So thank you for thinking out loud with me, you cool human, you.

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Sarai Speer: Natalie. Thank you. Honestly, I just love our conversations. I never know where they're gonna go. I'm so glad I don't, because, you know, I would have, I would have pre scripted things. That's the burden.

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Natalie P.: You're so smart, you are so stinking smart. Don't script your shit.

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Sarai Speer: Thank you. Thank you.

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Natalie P.: I'm talking. I'm talking to you. I'm talking. No, don't like you are so smart.

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Natalie P.: Yeah, like, I see you and I I celebrate with you. Yeah, my heart to yours, sister. Yeah.

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Sarai Speer: I feel it. I feel it. I'm getting a little tears.

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Natalie P.: Sure. Yeah.

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Sarai Speer: Thank you honestly.

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Natalie P.: And let's go. Make, let's go help. Women love each other, and and our and and themselves. And let's.

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Sarai Speer: Yeah.

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Natalie P.: To be a part of that like.

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Sarai Speer: Absolutely. And you know what, Natalie, I'm so glad you said that because it starts with ourselves, it starts with ourselves.

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Sarai Speer: loving and accepting ourselves and for me. I think this is going to be a lifelong journey, I think, for most of us.

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Natalie P.: I'm here for it.

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Sarai Speer: Wholly, unconditionally love ourselves, you know. Before we go. Can I share one big thing.

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Natalie P.: Yes, please.

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Sarai Speer: Okay. So I

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Sarai Speer: I had this moment the other day, and as someone who's had an Ed disorder for for 30 years of her life, and always tried to, you know, and all these other addictions, drug and alcohol. And Yada Yada.

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Sarai Speer: I've never thought I would be able to look at my body especially unclothed, and go, damn girl like you look good. Or the other day I got out of the bathtub, and my body is nowhere near as as small as it once used to be in, because I'm in recovery.

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Sarai Speer: And I looked at myself, and I turned around. I looked at my booty, and I was like bet bitch God, you look good.

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Sarai Speer: and I was like, Oh, my God, Sarai, did you? Just? Yes, I was like.

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Natalie P.: You did.

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Sarai Speer: And it's but it's years of work of like. Instead of saying, Oh, you look fat today. It's like, Okay.

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Sarai Speer: you look beautiful. You look beautiful. It's like all this reprogramming, and for me to have that moment I was like, Oh, my God, this is amazing! And no, don't get me wrong. I don't think every day I'm the hottest bitch on the planet, but every day you know what I do. I love myself. I accept myself.

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Sarai Speer: and it doesn't mean that I can't want to make changes to myself. It means that unconditionally. I know I am a bad, fucking bitch. I'm an amazing bitch with a big old fucking heart and a foul, fucking mouth, and I love me, and I accept me for that. So self acceptance is one of the biggest

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Sarai Speer: lessons, I think, that we women can learn, and then we don't hold on to that. We give other women that we give them the permission to explore that space, we give them the support that they need, so that self-love piece. Oh.

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Sarai Speer: it's so good, it's so good! And as someone who never thought she would find it bitch. I'm here, and I love it, and I want to sprinkle it on everybody now, because it feels so good.

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Natalie P.: We're gonna leave with some sprinkle.

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Natalie P.: Yeah sprinkles, or, as my friend Britt calls it, sparkle magic, sparkle magic.

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Natalie P.: I adore you. I'll see you. Next time we'll go live without even I'll just. I'll just phone. I'll just live. You.

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Sarai Speer: Perfect, you know. I'm down anytime, anytime.

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Natalie P.: Love it. Thanks for being here happy. International Women's Day. I am. I'm excited that you're a woman in my life. Yeah, for sure.

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Sarai Speer: Thank you.

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Natalie P.: Thanks, everybody.